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Gary Blaustein, Esq  March 13, 2024

Divorcing a High-Conflict Person 

Divorcing a high-conflict person is one of the most challenging situations anyone can face. High-conflict personalities can create an environment that is emotionally volatile and full of legal complications. In these situations, it's common to feel overwhelmed by the continuous conflicts, aggressive legal maneuvers, and overall sense of instability.  

Understanding the dynamics at play and approaching your divorce with a high-conflict ex-spouse requires strategic planning, emotional resilience, and the right legal advice. Throughout my years of experience, I have guided numerous clients through the hurdles of divorcing high-conflict individuals. My priority is to protect your rights and well-being while striving for the most favorable outcomes. If you're contemplating or have started the process of divorcing a high-conflict individual, retaining an experienced and empathetic family law attorney is a must. Reach out to me, Gary Blaustein, Esq, if you're in Somerset County, New Jersey, or the surrounding areas. 

What Is a High-Conflict Personality?

High-conflict personalities are characterized by patterns of behavior that can exacerbate the already stressful process of divorce. These individuals often demonstrate an excessive emotional response to disagreements, an inability to compromise, and a tendency to blame others without self-reflection. They might also engage in manipulative behaviors, including gaslighting and using children as leverage, making rational negotiation nearly impossible. 

Divorcing a high-conflict person is particularly challenging due to their relentless pursuit of conflict rather than resolution. Their need to "win" can lead to prolonged legal battles, increased financial costs, and significant emotional distress for all involved parties, including children.  

Additionally, high-conflict individuals may refuse to adhere to agreements or court orders, further complicating the divorce process. These intense legal issues can deplete one's emotional and financial resources, making it essential to have a strategic approach and professional guidance tailored to your family. 

High-Conflict Personalities in New Jersey Divorces

In New Jersey, divorcing a high-conflict partner poses unique challenges that the law recognizes. The legal system aims to mitigate the emotional and psychological impact on both parties and any children involved. It encourages dispute resolution methods that can help avoid prolonged court battles, such as mediation or collaborative law. However, when dealing with a high-conflict spouse, traditional dispute resolution may not always be effective, making it imperative to have a strong legal strategy in place. 

It's essential to document any instances of high-conflict behavior, as this information can be crucial during custody battles or when discussing the division of assets. New Jersey law prioritizes the well-being of the family, especially the children, in these situations. Therefore, demonstrating the impact of the high-conflict behavior on the family's emotional environment is a top priority. 

Strategies for Handling a High-Conflict Divorce

When divorce involves a high-conflict personality, the following strategies can be particularly effective: 

  • Develop a Robust Support System: Divorcing a high-conflict individual can be emotionally taxing, and having a strong support system can help you conquer these challenges. Consider seeking therapy or joining a support group to gain insight into your emotions and coping mechanisms. 

  • Legal Preparedness: Work closely with an experienced family law attorney who understands the nuances of divorcing a high-conflict person. This ensures you’re always one step ahead in your legal strategy. 

  • Documentation Is Key: Keep detailed records of all conflicts, communications, and issues that arise. This information can be invaluable in court or during settlement negotiations. 

  • Prioritize Your Safety and Well-Being: In situations where abuse (emotional, physical, or financial) is present, prioritize your safety. This may include seeking restraining orders or other protective legal measures. 

  • Focus on Effective Communication: Communication with a high-conflict ex can be fraught with challenges. Use written forms of communication for clarity and documentation, and always maintain a respectful tone, even when it's not reciprocated. 

  • Secure Your Financial Future: High-conflict divorces can have significant financial implications. Work with your divorce attorney to protect your assets and ensure a fair division of property. 

Why Choose Gary Blaustein, Esq as Your Attorney

Divorcing a high-conflict person is far from easy, but you don't have to go through it alone. With a keen understanding of New Jersey family law and a compassionate approach to each case, I, Gary Blaustein, Esq, am committed to guiding you through this challenging time. My approach is focused on achieving the best possible outcomes while minimizing the emotional toll on you and your family. 

If you're facing a divorce with a high-conflict partner in Somerset County, New Jersey, or the surrounding areas, including Basking Ridge, Warren, Somerville, and Bedminster, I'm here to help. My years of experience and focus on family law mean that I understand the problems you're facing.  

Schedule a consultation today. Together, we can create a strategy that protects your interests and paves the way for a brighter future. You’ve already taken a significant step by seeking information; now, take the next step by reaching out for professional support.


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