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Gary Blaustein, Esq March 6, 2024

My Ex Is Sabotaging My Relationship With Our Child

Many separated or divorced parents face parental alienation; it’s a common situation that can cause a lot of chaos within a family. Parental alienation happens when one parent, in an attempt to hurt the other, manipulates the child into turning against them.  

If you’re experiencing this, it may feel like you’ve lost control over your life and your relationships. However, it’s important to remember there is still a lot within your control, including how you secure strong communication channels, create boundaries, follow legal advice, and show unconditional love and support to your child. 

Throughout my years of practice, I've assisted numerous clients who found themselves in similar situations. I understand the emotional turmoil you're going through, and I want you to know that you're not alone. Your child is also a victim of this manipulation, and as a devoted parent, it's your responsibility to act. As your legal counsel, I’m committed to finding solutions that honor the best interests of your family and protect your rights. 

Parental Alienation and New Jersey Law 

Parental alienation is a serious matter addressed with great concern under New Jersey law. The law encourages minor children to have frequent and continuing contact with both parents after the parents have separated or dissolved their marriage. Parents are expected to share the rights and responsibilities of child-rearing to maintain the relationships with both parents (if it’s in the child’s best interests).   

The judicial system also acknowledges the profound emotional distress parental alienation inflicts on children. In severe instances, parental alienation may even prompt modifications to custody agreements. If you find yourself in this situation, with my help, we can be sure to collect evidence of this detrimental conduct and present it in court effectively. 

Signs and Behaviors to Look Out For

Recognizing parental alienation can be quite alarming. It involves one parent psychologically manipulating a child to distance them from the other parent, leading to a breakdown in the parent-child relationship. Some common signs to watch out for include your child suddenly becoming emotionally distant, showing unexplained anger towards you, or parroting negative comments about you that they have picked up from the other parent.  

Additionally, they may start refusing visitations or feel overwhelming guilt when spending time with you. If you notice any of these behaviors, address the issue promptly and seek appropriate support to protect your relationship with your child. 

What to Do if Your Ex Is Sabotaging You

If you find yourself facing parental alienation by your ex, consider the following steps: 

Maintain Open Communication: Strive for transparent and honest communication with your child, ensuring they feel safe and loved without forcing them to take sides. Try to find common ground with your ex and work towards creating a healthy environment for your child. If that's not possible, establish defined boundaries and secure your communication channels.  

Seek Legal Advice: Consult with a divorce attorney who is familiar with parental alienation cases to understand your rights and options. Always stay in touch with your attorney and keep them updated about any developments.  

Document Everything: Keep detailed records of your interactions with the other parent and any instances of alienating behavior you observe. 

Enforce Court Orders: Ensure that custody and visitation agreements are strictly adhered to. If violations occur, report them to your attorney. 

Attend Co-Parenting Counseling: If possible, participate in co-parenting counseling with your ex to improve communication and address issues affecting your child's well-being. 

Prioritize Your Child's Needs: Always put the emotional and physical needs of your child first, seeking professional help for them if they show signs of distress. 

Educate Yourself: Learn about parental alienation and its effects on children to better understand what your child may be experiencing. 

Maintaining a Positive Relationship With Your Child 

Despite the challenges you may face in co-parenting, it's crucial to maintain a positive and supportive relationship with your child. Consistency, love, and patience are key pillars in guiding your child through this phase. Take the time to teach them the importance of honesty in relationships. Let them know you’re there for them no matter what. Remember, your aim is to create a stable, nurturing environment for your child's growth and well-being, focusing on their needs above all else. 

Reach Out to Gary Blaustein, Esq. for Help

Parental alienation is an emotionally-charged issue that is hard on everyone involved. As your family law attorney, my approach is always client-focused, empathetic, and tailored to your unique circumstances. I understand the pain of feeling distanced from your child due to the manipulative actions of an ex-spouse. I'm here to help, providing advice and diligent representation to address this challenging situation.  

If you're dealing with parental alienation or suspect that your ex is sabotaging your relationship with your child, don't hesitate to reach out. With my years of experience serving clients throughout Somerset County, New Jersey, including Basking Ridge, Warren, Somerville, and Bedminster, I can provide the guidance you need to protect your relationship with your child. 

You don't have to face these challenging times alone. Schedule your consultation with me, Gary Blaustein, Esq., today. Let's take the first step together toward safeguarding your child and ensuring their emotional well-being. You're doing all you can to make the best of a tough situation, and I'm here to support you every step of the way.


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